Feb 26, 2007

Some of the many reasons I hate Walmart

They don't have the chili seasoning that I like….but Chappell's does!

Stupid people that park their carts in the MIDDLE of the isle.

Stupid people that park their cart on one side of the isle and then stand on the other side of the isle to get things off the shelf.

I automatically hate anyone that is in the coffee/bread isle and the shampoo isle.

If you have a child….do not let them run up and down the isle with your cart making racecar sounds. Kyle drives me crazy when he does that….and I don't take him by the bicycle isle anymore…..or the bouncy balls.

They don't have drawer-pulls or handles! I have found the one item that Wal-Mart doesn't carry…the guy actually told me to go to Lowes.

I totally hate people that don't stop at the end of the isle, but just pull out into on-coming cart traffic.

They are always out of original Beenie-Weenies….which Kyle loves. I throw-up in my mouth a little just putting them in my cart….YUCK!

To the crazy lady that was behind me in a blue Jeep while I was waiting for my kick-butt parking space……next time that I see you with your bug eyes and fried blonde hair yelling and honking at me to get out of your way….I will totally back into your car and scream "TTTAAAWWAANNDDDAAA!!!" I may not be older than you….but I do have more insurance.

Feb 17, 2007

Good Times Never Seem So Good

Where it began, I can't begin to know when
But then I know it's growing strong
Oh, wasn't the spring, whooo
And spring became the summer
Who'd believe you'd come along

Hands, touching hands, reaching out
Touching me, touching you
Oh, sweet Caroline
Good times never seem so good
I've been inclined to believe it never would

I hope that you had a wonderful birthday party!
It seemed like everyone in town came to help
you celebrate. The whole darn place was singing
your song!

And in that moment, YOUR moment, I realized that
MY life is wonderful. I was surrounded by girlfriends…
REAL girlfriends, including you. Girlfriends that I have
laughed with, cried with, been scared and excited with,
but mainly bowled with.

True girlfriends that will help me find a place to bury
the body when I finally *snap*. I know that you would
be the first to offer a shovel….probably decorated with
your signature pink bow.

Thank you for being there for me when I needed a
shoulder or a Washington State Martini, for letting me
flirt with your dad, for taking road trips to Kentucky and
Florida. Thank you for picking out my Christmas presents
and letting Kyle pass it off as his idea. Thanks for reading
my blog and NOT getting on MySpace to comment
(no pressure)! And most importantly, for eating as many
crab legs as I do.

Sweet Caroline, good times never seemed so good

Feb 14, 2007

Finding Home

It has been a little over six and a half years ago that I moved to Tennessee. I not only moved away from home and family and love, but from another life. Tennessee was a fresh start. It was a lot harder than I thought that it would be.

My job was wonderful and I loved my apartment, but moving to a new city on your own is hard. I would go to dinner and for drinks with people from work, but there was no real connection. I went on countless dates, but never found a spark. Tennessee never felt like home, just the place in which I was living.
Months later, a friend of mine came to visit. By that time, I was really homesick. So, we went to go see a Nashville band that used to frequent my college town. During a band break, I spoke to one of the musicians and told him that the band reminded me of home and good times.

A week later, I got an email from that musician that read:

Hey girl,
Just dropping you a line to let you know that we are back at the Flying Saucer tonight (Friday 13th) if you get a chance to get out. We also have a party going on for a close friend & musician Saturday complete with lots of homemade chicken wings, beer, & pickin' just down the road outside of Dickson. We don't just invite anyone to these hootenannies you know. Holler at us if your interested. Hope your doing fine!
Peace~ Brother Squirrel

Unfortunantly, I already had plans for that night and told him that I MIGHT make it, but it would be late when I arrived. I had my reservations:

Where in the world was Dickson?
As a single girl, should I go to a party alone?
How well did I really know this guy? I just met him a week before.
Why would he invite ME to a party?
What kind of wild parties do musicians have?

In the end, I threw caution to the wind. I arrived at the party around midnight, when it was in full swing. There were tons of people, tons of food, a bonfire, and a full blown band playing in the living room of a beautiful log cabin. Everyone seemed to know each other, so I was the odd-man-out, but this place was different. The people were warm and welcoming. It was more like home than any place in Nashville.

I was introduced to Kyle, the birthday boy, and knew that he was someone special. But I didn't get much conversation in before other people wanted his attention. So, I wandered the party meeting new people and having a good time.

A couple of hours later, the party was coming to an end and I decided that it was time to go back to my apartment. When I was saying goodbye to everyone, Kyle came over and asked me to sit and talk for a minute. Our conversation flowed like we had known each other for our whole lives. The next thing that I knew, the party had been over for hours and the sun was coming up.....we were still sitting at the kitchen table talking.

We still talk like the night that we first met. I still learn something new about him everyday. I still get the same feeling that I did when I first met him. When I look into his eyes, I see unborn children, vacations that we haven't yet taken and front-porch rocking chairs.

That night, I not only found love, but found HOME.

Happy Valentines Day, Punkin'!

Feb 13, 2007

Girls Just Want To Have Fun!

I found out this weekend that I am cool enough to be invited to my niece's birthday party. This isn't just any birthday party…this is a sleep-over slumber party! And I am not just invited as a chaperone, but as a GUEST! I will be one of the party girls! Turning thirty apparently did not affect my coolness with my favorite eight year old!

Even though I will be one of the party-goers, I would like to come up with some games to play, activities, etc. I am going to teach the girls to play Spoons, but since it has been YEARS since I have been to a slumber party, does anyone have any ideas?

Feb 11, 2007

Better place

When I first moved to Nashville, the thing that I missed most was my family. Not just my immediate family, but aunts, uncles, cousins, everyone. My parent's house was always a bustle of activity with family members stopping by just to chat. So, Kyle's family quickly became my family-away-from-home.

Kyle's grandmother is the oldest of six children and they still eat meals together four times a week. If I don't make it to at least two dinners per week, Granny Garton calls to tell me that she misses me and that if I don't show up for the next meal, she is going to "break my plate." Believe me, I don't miss too many meals. Everything that they cook is fresh out of the garden, fried in lard or smothered in gravy. There is nothing like a bunch of 80-year old ladies cooking your dinner for you!

This is wonderful to me because I lost my all of my grandparents when I was too young to appreciate them. My Grandaddy was the last to pass, when I was a freshman in high school. So when Granny Garton introduces me to people as her granddaughter, I almost tear up. The great-aunts and uncles are a special bonus too…it was like going from no living grandparents to having a dozen!

So, when Kyle's grandmother called EARLY this morning, I knew that I was going to get the news that I didn't want to hear. Great-Aunt Toosie had been in failing health for quite some time and, although we had expected it for a while, the news of her passing was almost too hard to take.

I feel as if I have lost one of my grandparents all over again. My eyes have burned all day and I can't seem to get this lump out of my throat.

I am heartbroken.

I will miss her dearly.

Feb 10, 2007

One of the many reasons I consider myself a HUGE NERD

Some people get really excited over the Grammys, some over the Oscars. I, however, am a little different. It is no secret that I have an overwhelming obsession with blogs. So, I am on pins and needles about the Bloggies. When the nominees for the Seventh Annual Weblog awards came out, I was thrilled to see a few of my favorite bloggers were among the finalist. The winners will be announced on Monday and I CAN'T WAIT. (I know, I know, I really need to get a life.)

If you get the chance, check out these pages…you will not be disappointed.

Dooce – http://www.dooce.com/ Possibly the best known blogger of all time. Dooce might be the first person in recorded history to get fired from her job because she blogged about it. She has an offbeat, extremely screwed-up sense of humor that always makes me laugh…about stuff that I shouldn't laugh about. If you do not read Dooce, the internet police should totally come to your house and take your computer away from you.

Postsecrets – http://postsecret.blogspot.com/ This weblog actually uses the U.S. Postal Service…which I think is very cool. Anyone that would like to contribute, anonymously writes down their secret on a postcard and mails it to the webhost. Some secrets are sweet or funny, some are heartbreaking and some are down-right scary. But it makes you feel good to know that you are not the only freak out there.

Overheard in New York – http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/ These are actual quotes that people have heard on the streets of New York. And I thought that I heard people say stupid stuff in Tennessee. If they don't make you laugh nothing will. Check out their sister-sites while you are there....Overheard on the Beach and Overheard in the Office.

Pink is the New Blog – http://www.pinkisthenewblog.com/ I normally don't read about celebrities, but every once in a while, I sneak over to Pink to get a fix. The bubble comments that they put over pictures totally make the weblog.

Smitten Kitchen – http://www.smittenkitchen.com/ Although I totally could not make any meal remotely close to what she does, I still love to read her recipes. Her photography could make roasted dog poop look appetizing. I started reading this website years ago, when it was http://www.thesmitten.com/. I find myself going back to her old posts all the time. I am sure that I will blog about my favorite post of hers in the near future.

I read several other blogs that didn't get nominated, so I will tell you about those in the future. In the mean time, click over to the Weblog Awards website and check out all the cool blogs that are out there! http://2007.bloggies.com/ It is really amazing that there are so many people out there with something to say!

Feb 8, 2007

The Blues Brothers are my favorite roommates

I have changed my profile picture to showcase my beloved favorite roommates, Jake and Elwood. I can say that they are my favorite, because they are, right now at least, my only roommates. Kyle is yet on another business trip. While 99.9999% of the time they are "Kyle's boys" they have become momma's boys in less than three days.

They are by far some of the coolest roommates that I have ever had. Here are just a few reasons why:

They enjoy my off-pitch, off-key, tone-deaf singing when I crank up the music to clean the house.

They love to help me cook by staying right under my feet in case I need their assistance.

Afterward, they are EAGER to help me do the dishes, by helping pre-clean them before I put them in the dishwasher.

Jake keeps me safe from the ceiling fan, at which he barks at upon entering any room.

They LOVE American Idol.

They won't let anyone near the house….especially that evil man that brings pizza.

Jake keeps my feet warm under the computer desk.

Elwood quickly lets me know when there is a squirrel in the yard.

They snore loudly, so I don't feel alone when I go to sleep.

And most importantly, they help me miss Kyle. They miss him as much as I do.
They snuggle with me to let me know that I am not alone. This house would be very lonely without them….thanks guys!

Feb 7, 2007

Ninja Karate Vampires

Thank you to Kyle's cousins and our nieces for giving me a gaming fix. As soon as Sunday dinner was over, there were these beautiful gals that forced me to play Spoons. They totally had to twist my arm.

This time we took Granny Garton's table cloth off the table, because we accidentally ripped a hole in it the last time that we played. For those of you that don't know, Spoons can get very violent. There is always at least one person with a puncture wound, gushing blood on the table. That just makes the spoons more slippery, which in turn makes the game more fun. The game is dangerous enough played with spoons, that is why it is not called Knives or Forks.

Sunday afternoon consisted of football, chicken wings and a very excitable six-year-old named Justin. Justin came with his parents to our annual Super Bowl gathering and he quickly turned into the life of the party. Hours of playing video games had warped his mind into thinking that he was an actual ninja karate vampire that could breathe fire. He killed me and drank my blood at least 600 times before half-time.

Although the highlight of the night was when we convinced him that he actually could breathe fire. At the exact time that he would hiss/growl/breath fire, my husband would turn up the gas on the fireplace for just a second. This AMAZED him and everyone in the room almost got a hernia from trying to choke back the laughter.

I hope that Justin comes to next year's Super Bowl party…I am going to teach that kid how to play Spoons.

Feb 3, 2007

Snow Day

Snow has a romantic quality to me. It makes me want to snuggle on the couch, under the arm of my husband, wrapped in a quilt. So when I woke yesterday morning to a white blanket over the yard, I was thrilled…except for the fact that I woke up to an empty house. Kyle had flown to Michigan on a business trip and there was no one to help celebrate the new fallen snow.

I felt so lonely.

Snow makes me really homesick. As both of my parents were school teachers, they were always home with us when there was a "snow day" at school. Our house usually was full of neighborhood kids by noon. Between sledding and snowball fights, mom would dry our snow-sopped clothes in the dryer and we would gobble down big bowls of homemade vegetable beef soup.

My mother would always start a new jigsaw puzzle that had a gazillion pieces and filled up the entire dining room table. But, the table in the kitchen is where all the action happened. Hours of games were played….Life, Trumpet, Skip-Bo, Dominoes, Pictionary, Phase 10 and too many others to count. Between games, we would wander into the dining room and put a few pieces in Mom's puzzle. It was always a contest to see who would get to put in the last piece. There was always a missing piece that, by some miraculous act of God, my brother always found in his pocket. He hates to lose.

We would huddle around the television to watch the ten o'clock news, silently praying that school would be called off the next day. When our prayers were answered, the floor would fill up with sleeping bags, so we could do it all again the next day.

So, as I looked out my front door at the first snow of the year, my heart broke a little bit. I missed my family and childhood friends and innocence and vegetable soup. But last night, as I snuggled under the arm of my husband, I knew that no matter how far away he was that morning, I shouldn't have been lonely…because he is the last piece to my puzzle.

Feb 2, 2007

Blogging 101

If there was a Blogging 101 class, the first writing exercise would be to make a "100 Things" list. Every blogger has to have one. So, since I have officially joined the blogging world, I've jotted down a few things about myself. So without further adieu, here are 100 things that you wish you would have never known about me:
1. I only drink Coke out of a can with a straw.
2. I love public radio…especially Prairie Home Companion and Whad'Ya Know
3. I once made myself sick from eating too many olives.
4. My driver's license picture is pretty cute.
5. I balance my checkbook everyday.
6. I will admit it, I am not perfect. My second toe is longer than my big toe. There, now the secret is out, are you happy?
7. My hair turned naturally curly when I became anemic in college. I also dropped down to 107 pounds, which is not good when you are 5'7". My mother thought that I was bulimic and had my roommate follow me to the bathroom to make sure I wasn't tossing my cookies.
8. I am really scared that I can't come up with 100 things about myself.
9. I have a younger brother. He is one of the funniest people that I know.
10. When I grew up, I wanted to either be Dolly Parton or one of Dean Martin's Gold Diggers. I am sure that this made my mother proud.
11. I love coats.
12. Video games give me motion sickness, but I rarely get sick in the car. And I love rollercoasters.
13. I have my own bowling ball and I know how to use it.
14. I don't have a birthmark.
15. I have too many sweaters.
16. During the summer between my junior and senior year of high school, I worked in a photography studio. The photographer gave me all my senior pictures for free.
17. My parents collect Coca-Cola memorabilia and I grew up going to conventions every summer.
18. The first time that I flew in a plane, I was the pilot. I took off and I landed.
19. In an accident when I was younger, I completely ripped off my big toe nail.
20. July 21st, 2007, I will be standing in line at midnight to get the final Harry Potter book.
21. I love any kind of game. Board games, puzzles, card games, especially Spoons.
22. At last count, I think I have been to 33 states, Mexico and Canada.
23. My 30th birthday didn't bother me as much as I thought that it would.
24. I married my best friend.
25. I had my own phone line as a teenager.
26. Twins run in my family. My father's mother was a twin and my mother's aunt was a twin. Since I do not have children yet…this scares me.
27. I am a descendant of a pirate that was hung in Bermuda in 1610.
28. I got braces and glasses the same school year…I thought I would rather die.
29. I was homecoming queen.
30. I once ate so many crab legs that my father asked me NOT to go back to the buffet.
31. I had a pet turtle that died of a soft shell.
32. I dye my hair to cover the gray.
33. I love math. It is the same in any language.
34. As a child I was once lost in the basement of an Atlanta hotel during a fire alarm.
35. My first real kiss broke up with me because my dad was his math teacher and he was afraid of getting a bad grade.
36. I wasn't nervous on my wedding day.
37. I totally freaked out about a month before.
38. I used to sleep walk and actually locked myself out of a hotel room while sleepwalking.
39. I cannot sing. At all.
40. I miss traveling for business. Especially to New York City.
41. I almost have a complete collection of Calvin & Hobbes books.
42. I hate ketchup.
43. I can't do a cartwheel.
44. My mother taught kindergarten.
45. I gave my cousin chicken pox when she was 8 months pregnant. She still hasn't forgiven me for it.
46. I hate milk.
47. I was member of Girl Scout Brownie Troop #1075 and we made a kick-butt cookbook!
48. I hate my laugh.
49. I flew to New York City in October of 2001. I got a couple blocks away from Ground Zero, but decided not to go. The smell still haunts me.
50. I have Seasonal Affective Disorder.
51. Ancestors of my family lived in the town that I live in now. Their farm was right next to my husband's ancestor's farm in the 1860s. As a kicker, the house in which I met my husband is located on a piece of land that was his family's farm at that time.
52. I was once a ring girl at a boxing match.
53. I played the flute in middle school band.
54. I watch the Super Bowl just for the commercials.
55. I am too scared to get a tattoo.
56. I hate heart-shaped things. Except for Valentine's Day Sweet-Tarts.
57. I have never tried any recreational drugs, even pot. I am a drug virgin.
58. I am ashamed of the way that I acted when I was younger.
59. That inspires me to be a better person.
60. I have a full-proof way to get rid of the hiccups.
61. A few years ago, I had a pre-cancerous growth that scared me. A lot.
62. Snow makes me miss my mother.
63. I love salt.
64. I once talked to Gene Simmons on the telephone, but didn't realize who I was talking to until I got off the phone and my boss told me.
65. I asked him who Gene Simmons was.
66. I am allergic to paper money. Really.
67. French fries dipped in mayonnaise are awesome.
68. Even though I was an event planner, I flipped out planning my own wedding.
69. I drove my friends home on my 21st birthday.
70. I apologize too much. Sorry.
71. My 2006 new years resolution was to be more of a bitch….umm…I mean stand up for myself more. I am doing a good job so far.
72. Prince was my favorite concert.
73. I have an obsession with Fiestaware.
74. Runny eggs disgust me.
75. I love talking to my mother on the phone.
76. When I was little, I had an imaginary dog named Barkley that lived in our downstairs bathroom.
77. I use exclamation points too much!!!!!!!!!!
78. I have stretch marks on my knees from when I grew too fast as a teenager.
79. I am a lightweight. After about a drink and a half I have a really good time.
80. I worked at The Limited for years, but I hate shopping for clothes.
81. I'd go crazy without Kyle.
82. I love old photographs and antique furniture.
83. I get homesick way too often.
84. I can't sleep in socks or with my head under the covers.
85. I take hot showers to the point that I run out of hot water.
86. This is probably the reason that I have really dry skin.
87. I still have my childhood teddy bear. His name is Fred and he sits on a shelf in my closet with my too many sweaters.
88. He has an oil stain over his left eye where I dropped him at a gas station in Arizona.
89. My parents are perfect.
90. In the first grade, my friends and I would mark on our hands with a green marker, then cover it with Elmer's glue and wait for it to dry. Then at recess, we would tear the glue off to reveal the green and pretend we were aliens from the television show V.
91. I didn't like hamburgers until I was a teenager and I tried one without ketchup.
92. Although I have my reservations, I am excited that Hillary is running for President.
93. I think that I will be a good parent.
94. I have been in a room with a ghost.
95. I am on a mission to own every color of Old Navy flip-flops.
96. I am proud of myself for moving to the city on my own.
97. I once killed an Aloe plant, which I thought was impossible.
98. I snore.
99. If I had it to do all over again, I would do it differently.
100. As long as I ended up where I am, right here, right now.

Feb 1, 2007

Chicken Dance Gone Wrong

"You should start a blog. You are addicted to them and I think that you would be really good." She stared at me, waiting for a response.

"I would love too." I said half-heartedly. What I really wanted to say, was that I wouldn't be any good at it. I wouldn't be able to verbalize what I really wanted/needed to say. I can never live up to my blogging idols…..Dooce, Stephanie Klein, My Tiny Kingdom and MANY others. My words would never flow as easily onto the page as theirs. Their words dance on the page…mine would be more like the Chicken Dance at a wedding reception that has gone on WAY too long.

I am scared I won't be taken seriously as a writer….as I have never written much before. Term papers are about the extent of what I have written in the past. Silly papers titled "The Balance of Power and What It Is Today." (Actually, I am kind of proud of that one.)

So, tucking all my fears aside, I am going to jump in with both feet. I will either flourish or crash in a burning heap, but at least I can say that I tried. And what is life, if you don't give things a chance, right?